Embracing Resistance: Why What We Avoid Holds the Most Growth

Welcome to the 3-Part Series: “Navigating the Unknown: Intuition, Resistance, and Growth”

Welcome, listeners, to a special 3-part series on The Dang Good Show where we’re diving into something we all encounter but often struggle to understand—those gut feelings, inner nudges, and moments of resistance that come up on our journey through life. This series, “Navigating the Unknown: Intuition, Resistance, and Growth,” is all about exploring the parts of ourselves that guide us—even when we might not realize it.

In each episode, we’ll break down different aspects of intuition and resistance, looking at why we sometimes resist the things that are ultimately best for us, and how learning to tune into our intuition can lead us to unexpected growth. We’ll discuss real-life examples, personal stories, and tips for recognizing these signals in your own life.

In Episode 35, “Trusting the Gut: How Intuition Guides Us to Growth,” we’ll talk about what it means to listen to your inner voice and how connecting with your intuition can reveal new paths and possibilities.

Episode 36, “Embracing Resistance: Why What We Avoid Holds the Most Growth,” takes a look at why we push back against change or challenges, and how, by embracing what we resist, we can unlock some of our most significant growth.

Finally, in Episode 37, “Intuition vs. Logic: Finding the Balance in Big Decisions,” we’ll explore the interplay between intuition and logic—learning how to use both in making decisions that feel right and lead us to a more fulfilling life.

This series is all about empowering you to trust yourself, embrace the unknown, and see resistance as an opportunity. 

—--------------———————————

In Episode 36 of The Dang Good Show, we’re diving into the topic of resistance—why we often push back against change or challenges and how embracing what we resist can lead us to some of our greatest growth. Join me as I share personal stories of learning the hard way and discovering how curiosity helped me navigate life’s twists and turns. We’ll explore real-life examples of resilience, practical strategies to start embracing resistance, and the power of reframing our mindset to see obstacles as opportunities. This episode is a reminder that growth often lies just beyond what makes us uncomfortable. If you’re ready to transform your perspective on resistance and unlock your potential, tune in!

Notes:

• 00:00 - Intro: The Purpose of Embracing Resistance
• 01:50 - Segment 1: Understanding Resistance and Why It’s Natural
• 03:33 - Segment 2: My Personal Journey with Resistance and Growth
• 05:38 - Segment 3: Curiosity and My Seoul Trip – Learning to Embrace What I Resist
• 07:47 - Segment 4: Practical Tips for Embracing Resistance
• 10:57 - Segment 5: Recognizing Patterns and Avoiding Regret
• 12:37 - Segment 6: Real-Life Examples of Embracing Resistance
• 15:28 - Segment 7: Practical Strategies for Embracing Resistance
• 19:00 - Segment 8: Recognizing Resistance in Relationships and Work
• 20:38 - Segment 9: Personal Reflection Exercise – Embracing Resistance
• 22:02 - Conclusion: Wrapping Up with a Challenge

Transcript

[00:00 - Intro: The Purpose of Embracing Resistance]
CD: Hey, everyone! Welcome back to The Dang Good Show! This is Episode 36, and it’s the second part in our 3-part series, “Navigating the Unknown: Intuition, Resistance, and Growth.” I’m so glad you’re here with me today, and I think this topic is going to hit home for a lot of us.

Now, you might be wondering why I chose these topics for this series. Well, with fall and winter settling in, the days are getting darker, the sun isn’t out as long, and for many of us, that can mean feeling more reflective or even facing things we tend to push aside during the brighter months. It’s a perfect time to talk about leaning into the unknown, especially when it comes to listening to our intuition, facing resistance, and using both to foster growth.

Today, we’re focusing on resistance. We’re diving into why we naturally push back against things that feel uncomfortable or challenging. I’m sure we’ve all had those moments—those decisions or opportunities we avoided because they just felt too daunting. But what if the very things we resist the most are the ones that hold the biggest potential for growth?

So let’s get into it. In this episode, we’ll be exploring why we resist change and how, by embracing what we avoid, we can unlock some of the most profound growth in our lives.

[01:50 - Segment 1: Understanding Resistance and Why It’s Natural]
CD: Alright, let’s start by understanding what resistance actually is and why it’s such a common response. Resistance, in simple terms, is our natural instinct to avoid anything that feels uncertain, challenging, or uncomfortable. It’s almost like an internal “brake” system that kicks in when we sense we’re heading toward something unfamiliar.

This instinct to resist actually comes from a really old part of our brain. Our ancestors relied on resistance to keep them safe from dangerous situations. The brain is wired to prioritize safety and comfort, so anything that feels like it might disrupt that balance can trigger resistance.  

Today, of course, we’re not facing life-or-death situations daily, but that ancient wiring is still there. And instead of using it to protect ourselves from wild animals, it’s now reacting to things like big changes, new jobs, or even new relationships. We’re afraid of failing, afraid of not being good enough, or simply afraid of the unknown.

But here’s the twist: growth rarely happens in our comfort zones. If you want to grow, to learn, and to evolve, it usually means stepping into something a little uncomfortable. And that’s where resistance comes in—it’s almost like a signal that you’re on the edge of something important.

[03:35 - Segment 2: My Personal Journey with Resistance and Growth]

CD:Now, I want to get a little personal here. Let me take you back to my early 20s, a time when I was just stepping into adulthood. I’ll be honest—I thought I had it all figured out. I had that typical youthful confidence where you believe you know what’s best and don’t need advice. I resisted anything that didn’t align with my version of “the right path.”

Looking back, I see how much my resistance held me back in some areas. I was scared to try new things or even listen to new perspectives because I thought I already had the answers. And you know what? I ended up making a lot of mistakes because of that. I had to learn things the hard way, through trial and error, often because I resisted accepting guidance or embracing change.

Then, before my first solo trip to Seoul, South Korea, I came across The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It’s funny how a single book can shift your mindset, isn’t it? That book opened my eyes to the power of acceptance. I started to see that a lot of my resistance came from fear—fear of things going wrong, fear of being responsible for every outcome, and, if I’m honest, fear of losing control.

If I’m being really open, I’ll tell you that I struggled with depression throughout my 20s. I was constantly stressed, always trying to control every little detail, always assuming that if something went wrong, it was somehow my fault. But reading that book made me realize that resisting life only made things harder.

[05:39 - Segment 3: Curiosity and My Seoul Trip – Learning to Embrace What I Resist]

CD: So fast forward to that solo trip to Seoul, South Korea. I had every reason to be scared—this was my first trip overseas, and I planned to stay for four months. On top of that, it felt like everyone was telling me not to go. Family members who usually didn’t reach out suddenly called me up, practically ordering me to stay home. But there was something in me, a gut feeling, telling me that this experience would be worth it.

I took that flight and, honestly, it  was terrifying. I landed in a completely new city, where I didn’t speak the language fluently, had no family nearby, and barely knew anyone. I remember getting lost constantly those first few days, and at first, I’d feel this surge of panic, thinking, “What am I doing here?” But then, almost as a way of coping, I started approaching each moment with curiosity.

Instead of freaking out, I’d ask myself, “Where is this going to take me?” And, surprisingly, that shift in mindset made all the difference. I’d stumble upon amazing places I’d never have discovered otherwise—hidden alleyways filled with art, quiet temples with centuries of history, little food stalls that served the best street food I’d ever tasted.

In those moments, I learned something powerful: resistance isn’t just a barrier—it’s an invitation. It’s an invitation to be curious, to explore, and to discover. By embracing the discomfort of being in a foreign place, I found a new sense of freedom. I became more attuned to my surroundings, learned to navigate the city on my own, and felt a sense of accomplishment that changed my entire perspective.

[07:51 - Segment 4: Practical Tips for Embracing Resistance] 

CD: So, how do we actually embrace resistance in our everyday lives? Let me share a few strategies that have helped me and that I think could help you, too.

1. Shift Your Perspective on Resistance

• Think of resistance as a signal that you’re on the verge of something important. Instead of seeing it as a wall, view it as a doorway that could lead to new growth.

• Every time you feel resistance, ask yourself, “What could I gain by exploring this?” This helps reframe resistance as an opportunity rather than an obstacle.

2. Ask “What’s the Worst That Could Happen?”

• Often, the fear behind resistance is rooted in the worst-case scenario. But when you break it down, you’ll usually find that the worst case isn’t as scary as you thought.

• By confronting this fear, you’re taking away some of its power. You’re telling yourself, “Even if the worst happens, I can handle it.”

3. Make Curiosity a Habit

• One of the best ways to get comfortable with resistance is to build a habit of curiosity. Try to make small, uncomfortable choices every day, like talking to a new person or exploring a new part of your city.

• When you’re curious, you’re less focused on outcomes and more focused on the experience. This approach makes it easier to face resistance without feeling overwhelmed.

4. Do Your Research

• Knowledge can be a powerful tool in overcoming resistance. When you’re faced with a decision that feels intimidating, gather as much information as you can. Before I went to Seoul, I did tons of research on the city, the culture, and even took Korean classes to help me feel more prepared.

• Knowing more about what you’re facing makes it easier to stand your ground and trust your choice. It’s not just about preparation—it’s about building confidence in your ability to handle what comes next.

5. Anchor Yourself in the Present Moment

• When we resist, it’s often because we’re worrying about the future or clinging to the past. By focusing on the present, you’re less likely to let these worries take over.

• Meditation, deep breathing, or simply grounding yourself can make it easier to embrace the moment without resistance.

[10:55 - Segment 5: Recognizing Patterns and Avoiding Regret]

CD: Another lesson I’ve learned from embracing resistance is the importance of recognizing patterns in my life. Think about it: how many times have you gone along with something, even though it didn’t feel right, only to regret it later?

For me, this was a big issue when I was younger. I used to say yes to things out of obligation or because I wanted to keep up with what others were doing. I’d go to every social event, take on every project, and basically burn myself out because I resisted saying no.

But over time, I started to see a pattern. I realized that when I ignored my gut feelings and did things out of obligation, I usually ended up feeling drained and, ultimately, regretted it. This pattern helped me understand that resistance can sometimes be a signpost, showing me what I don’t want and guiding me toward what I do.

[12:45 - Segment 6: Real-Life Examples of Embracing Resistance]

CD:One of the best ways to understand the value of embracing resistance is by looking at real-life examples—those stories of people who faced intense pushback, only to come out stronger. These stories remind us that resistance often brings growth, even when it feels impossible in the moment.

1. Oprah Winfrey’s Early Career Rejections

Let’s start with Oprah Winfrey. We all know her as a media mogul and one of the most influential people in the world, but did you know that early in her career, she was fired from her first television job as an anchor? Her boss told her she was “unfit for television.” Imagine hearing that at the start o f your career! For many, that would’ve been a moment to retreat, to give up, or to choose a safer path. But Oprah embraced the resistance. She used it as fuel to push forward, which eventually led her to her own show, her own network, and a global platform to inspire millions. Oprah turned that moment of rejection into a pivotal part of her story. Her example shows us that when we’re faced with resistance, it’s often an opportunity to build resilience and, in her case, to find a unique path to success.

2. Steve Jobs and His Firing from Apple

Another classic example is Steve Jobs. He was famously fired from Apple, the very company he co-founded. Imagine being kicked out of something you helped create! Jobs could have walked away or let resentment fester, but instead, he chose to dive deeper into his passion. He started other ventures, including Pixar, which eventually became one of the most successful animation studios in the world. When he returned to Apple years later, he brought with him the experiences and insights he gained during his time away. His story shows us that resistance can sometimes be life’s way of redirecting us, preparing us to return stronger and with a fresh perspective.

These examples are powerful reminders that resistance isn’t always a barrier—it’s often a catalyst for transformation. When we choose to embrace it, rather than avoid it, we open ourselves up to opportunities we may never have considered.

[15:38 - Segment 7: Practical Strategies for Embracing Resistance]

CD:Alright, we’ve talked about why resistance happens, shared some personal and public examples, and explored why embracing it is crucial for growth. But how do we actually do it? Let’s break it down into some practical strategies that you can start applying today.

1. Mindfulness and Self-Awareness

• Mindfulness is one of the most effective tools for dealing with resistance. By becoming aware of our thoughts and feelings in the present moment, we can start to identify where the resistance is coming from.

• When you feel that inner pushback, take a few deep breaths. Sit with the discomfort instead of immediately reacting to it. Ask yourself, “What am I resisting, and why?”

• Recognizing your resistance is the first step to embracing it.

2. Reframe Your Thoughts

• Often, resistance stems from negative or limiting beliefs. Thoughts like “I’m not good enough” or “This is too risky” fuel our avoidance.

• Practice reframing these thoughts. Instead of thinking, “This is too hard,” try, “This is a challenge, and I’m capable of handling it.” Reframing creates a mindset shift, making it easier to see resistance as an opportunity rather than a threat.

3. Take Small Steps Toward Discomfort

• One of the best ways to build a habit of embracing resistance is to take small steps into uncomfortable situations. Start with something manageable—a conversation you’ve been avoiding or a new hobby you’ve wanted to try.

• Each time you face a small challenge, you’re training yourself to be more resilient. Over time, this makes it easier to tackle larger resistances without feeling overwhelmed.

4. Celebrate Small Wins

• Embracing resistance can be draining, so it’s essential to recognize and celebrate your progress, even the small victories. Maybe you went to a social event you would’ve skipped or started that side project you’ve been putting off.

• Celebrating small wins reinforces the idea that you’re capable of handling discomfort. It builds confidence, making it easier to embrace future challenges.

5. Remember the Bigger Picture

• When we’re in the thick of resistance, it’s easy to lose sight of why we’re pushing through. Take a moment to remind yourself of the bigger picture—the goals you’re working toward, the person you want to become.

• Keeping your long-term vision in mind can be incredibly motivating. It reminds you that this moment of discomfort is a stepping stone on the path to growth.

[19:15 - Segment 8: Recognizing Resistance in Relationships and Work]

CD: Another area where resistance often comes up is in our relationships and work environments. Sometimes, the things we resist in these spaces hold valuable lessons and  growth opportunities.

1. Relationships

• In relationships, resistance can look like avoiding difficult conversations, ignoring problems, or resisting vulnerability. Maybe you avoid addressing a recurring issue because it feels too uncomfortable to bring up, or perhaps you hold back from fully expressing yourself out of fear.

• Embracing resistance in relationships might mean having that tough conversation, being open about your feelings, or setting a boundary. These moments of resistance can strengthen your relationships and help you connect on a deeper level.

2. Work Environment

• At work, resistance can show up as a reluctance to take on new responsibilities, avoiding leadership roles, or resisting feedback. You might think, “I’m not ready for this,” or “What if I fail?”

• Embracing these opportunities, even if they feel intimidating, can lead to significant career growth. Maybe taking on a new project allows you to develop skills you didn’t know you had, or accepting feedback helps you improve in ways you hadn’t considered.

[20:54 - Segment 9: Personal Reflection Exercise – Embracing Resistance]

CD:Alright, let’s bring it back to you. Here’s a quick exercise to help you reflect on areas in your life where you might be resisting growth.

1. Identify a Current Resistance

• Think of something in your life right now that you’re resisting. It could be a change, a decision, or even a conversation you’ve been avoiding.

2. Explore the Why

• Write down why you’re resisting it. Are you afraid of failure? Worried about others’ opinions? Dig deep into the reasons behind your resistance.

3. Reframe and Take Action

• Now, try to reframe your thoughts around this resistance. Instead of seeing it as a threat, see it as an opportunity for growth. Ask yourself, “What could I gain by facing this?”

4. Take a Small Step

• Finally, make a commitment to take one small step toward this area of resistance. It could be as simple as starting a conversation or doing research on something you’re unsure about. The goal is to take action, however small, to show yourself that you can handle it.

[22:19 - Conclusion: Wrapping Up with a Challenge]

CD:Alright, my friends, that brings us to the end of today’s episode on embracing resistance. I hope this conversation has inspired you to look at resistance in a new light—as a signal for growth rather than something to avoid.

Now, I want to leave you with a challenge. Think about one area in your life where you feel resistance. This week, I challenge you to lean into it, just a little. It doesn’t have to be a huge leap—just a small step that shows you’re willing to explore the unknown.

Thank you so much for tuning in to The Dang Good Show! If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who might benefit from hearing it. And if you haven’t yet, subscribe to stay up-to-date with each new episode.

Next up in our series, we’ll be talking about balancing intuition and logic when making big decisions. It’s going to be a great conversation, so don’t miss it.

Until next time, stay curious, embrace the unknown, and keep growing. Much love, CDANG, signing off!